My Plan

I’m glad I went to college before the ubiquity of email. My daughter, who starts classes on Monday, got an email from one of her professors on Saturday. He sent the normal syllabus and class schedule, but he also included the first long reading assignment, which was due on the first day of class.

Gone are the halcyon days when you got to enjoy the last days before class started—rather like sipping the last of the summer wine. Instead, you get assigned the first two chapters of Corporate Accounting, a required classes for math majors since they need to learn how to manage the wealth they’ll acquire by majoring in something other than the humanities.

After reading the materials, Ariel came to me and tried to explain to me how to read a corporate accounting statement. I listened politely, but the truth is I don’t care. I hope and pray that I will never, ever have to read a corporate accounting statement. In fact, isn’t this why you send your children to college—so that they can learn to do things you can’t. Then you can mooch off their knowledge. That’s my plan.